Uncaging the Good Girl with Certified Master Level Coach Holly TorontoMay 27, 2021
One of the most profound shifts I’ve made in my spiritual practice is understanding that it is a subtractive process, rather than an additive one. The simplest way to explain this is that you can approach spirituality thinking that you are not whole, needing to be fixed and grasping for the next modality, teacher, guru or tool to hold you together, OR you can approach spirituality with the intention of remembering who your True Self is.
When you do this, you can clearly see the stories, narratives and conditions that you used to create a sense of safety and belonging in your life. And when you approach spirituality from this perspective, it’s pretty simple. It’s about shedding those layers of survival strategies to get to who you always were underneath it all.
In today’s episode, I discuss one of the most common archetypal identities that our Egos create to help us feel useful, validated and worthy of love: The Good Girl. I asked my good friend Holly Toronto to help me explore this idea because as you’ll hear in her story, she’s had quite the heroine’s journey along this path of soothing her Good Girl and reclaiming her True Self.
From her evangelical Christian upbringing, she was conditioned to give others the moral authority to judge what would deem her good and worthy of acceptance. Her work of shedding layers upon layers manifested in her needing to explore this shadow side of herself even as she released her identity as a Christian.
What You'll Learn in this Episode:
- The Archetype of the “Good Girl” and how she serves in early childhood
- The danger of allowing other people to decide our goodness
- How to stand in our own integrity when we are “called out” and told we are a “bad girl”
- What it feels like somatically to stand in integrity
- The invitational nature of triggers for deeper healing and exploration
- Slowing down the pace of personal development work to actually be nourished by it
Kat Lee is an Intimacy + Relationship Coach, host of The Empowered Curiosity Podcast and Creator of The Heart Lab. She guides pattern-breakers to alchemize their emotions and embody their healing journey to cultivate intimacy as a spiritual practice.
Holly Toronto is a Certified Master Level Coach who has 5 years of experience helping women stop prioritizing other people’s expectations of beauty, belief or behavior so that they can live their life from a place of Wholeness, fully aligned with the truth of who they are.
I facilitate conversations through 1:1 coaching and various community offerings to guide curious humans to remember their True Self - who they are beyond the conditioning, the "shoulds", the trauma stories + the overriding of desires. If you need permission to step into the wholeness of your emotions and Being, let me show you that you’ve been the one holding the pen.